Monday, March 18, 2024

The History of WWE WrestleMania: XIV

WrestleMania raids my hometown to kick off the Austin Era....

Fleet Center - 3/29/98

It's fitting that 'Mania 14 took place on the anniversary of 'Mania 3.  The 14th edition was to the late 90s WWF as the 3rd was to the late 80s.  In both cases a major star (with serious back problems) seemingly nearing the end of his career passed the torch to the man of the hour, and a major boom period followed.

In the main event, Steve Austin defeated Shawn Michaels for the WWF Title, which kicked off possibly the most successful financial run any single wrestler has ever enjoyed.  The match itself, while not a five-star classic, was a very strong main event, and Shawn's performance is nothing short of a miracle given how badly he was hurting at the time.  This would be his final match for over four years.  On the outside of the ring was celebrity guest Mike Tyson, whose presence sparked a media frenzy which garnered a ton of mainstream hype for the event.  This, my friends, is how you utilize a celebrity guest star in wrestling.

The semi-main event slot went to the Undertaker and his onscreen brother Kane.  The buildup for this match lasted about nine months, from the original announcement that Taker had a brother.  When Kane finally debuted, the company did an excellent job of establishing him as an unstoppable monster, and held off giving away too much physical interaction between him and Taker.  By the time this match finally took place it truly felt like Taker would be facing his ultimate adversary, and the match didn't disappoint. This was arguably Taker's best 'Mania match to date and was also a career-making match for Kane.

It's like King Kong vs. Godzilla!  OH MY GAHD!!!

The History of WWE WrestleMania: 13

A "lost smile" threw a wrench into the WWF's plans for WrestleMania 13, but they managed to make some lemonade.  Mixed metaphors.....

Rosemont Horizon - 3/23/97 

1997 was the WWF's ratings nadir during the Monday Night War with WCW.  They were right in the middle of an 82-week trouncing, and their PPV buyrates reflected that - 'Mania 13 did an abysmal .72 I believe.

But early '97 was also the very beginning of the Attitude era, before the WWF even fully acknowledged that the business was radically changing.  Snow-white babyface characters were no longer cool to cheer for; instead it was a foul-mouthed, beer-swilling, redneck bully named Steve Austin who captured the fans' imagination and became their hero.  The company was about to switch gears in a major way.

The WWF's original plan for WrestleMania 13's centerpiece was a rematch of Bret Hart vs. Shawn Michaels from the previous year.  Shawn apparently suffered a knee injury just 6 weeks before the big show (which may or may not have faked, to avoid doing the job for Bret) and announced that he'd be taking time off indefinitely, thus relinquishing the WWF Title.  This left the company scrambling for a new main event to build the show around. 

Sucky main event, but this was a nice moment

Two title changes later, and the belt was back around the waist of Sycho Sid, who it was announced would be defending against The Undertaker (marking the first time Taker would challenge for a championship at WrestleMania).  Seemingly Taker and Sid tried to emulate the Taker-Diesel match from 'Mania 12, but unfortunately it failed to live up to that match, and a subpar main event was the result.  This match went too long and, as was often the case, Sid looked lost for much of it.  Taker finally won the WWF Title however, giving the show a feel-good ending.

The other big matchup was the aforementioned Steve Austin vs. an angry, edgier Bret Hart in a no holds barred Submission match, with UFC import Ken Shamrock as the guest referee.  The ensuing battle was nothing short of legendary.  From an action standpoint there have certainly been better matches (including Bret-Austin 1 at Survivor Series '96, IMO), but I can't think of a better example of pure storytelling in a wrestling match (in WWE at least).  Bret went into this match the babyface and left a reviled, vicious heel.  Austin went into the match a nasty bully and emerged as a gallant, tough-as-nails anti-hero.  The visual of Austin being trapped in Bret's Sharpshooter as torrents of blood streamed down his face became one of pro wrestling's iconic images.  Masterful work by both guys.

Is there a more violently iconic image in the history of wrestling?

Friday, March 15, 2024

The History of WWE WrestleMania: XII

Shawn Michaels realizes his Boyhood Dream.....

Arrowhead Pond - 3/31/96

'Mania 12 was a quantum leap over its predecessor in terms of big-show presentation and wrestling quality.  The card featured only six matches (plus one on the pre-show), but the WWF showcased their talented if somewhat shrunken roster plus a few nostalgic stars, with no guest celebrities whatsoever, and the result was a very solid show with few bad spots.

The hot opener was a very strong six-man tag with Vader, Owen Hart & Davey Boy Smith facing off with Yokozuna, Ahmed Johnson, and Jake Roberts. Yoko had just turned babyface after being scorned by manager Jim Cornette in favor of Vader.  Had Yoko's team won he'd have gotten Cornette in the ring for five minutes.  This star-studded match was fast-paced and helped build the Vader contingent as a dominant heel faction, after Vader took out Jake with a Vader Bomb.

Next up was the bizarre Backlot Brawl between Goldust and Roddy Piper - a very violent, stiff fight shot in the parking lot.  This portion of the "match" taken by itself was pretty solid and accomplished what it needed to.  Unfortunately it led to a lame recurring O.J. Simpson joke throughout the show and ended with Piper stripping Goldust down to his lingerie in the ring.  Not sure you could get away with an ending like this today.

STONE COLD!  STONE COLD!  ST-- Oh wait, that wasn't a thing yet?

In the third slot was the debut of a young lion named Stone Cold Steve Austin, who had a decent midcard bout with Savio Vega.  Nothing mindblowing, but not a bad 'Mania debut for the future Hall of Famer.  Austin won after hitting Savio with manager Ted Dibiase's Million Dollar Belt and slapping on a very bad looking Million Dollar Dream sleeper hold.

The fourth match was the only real throwaway of the night, as rising star Hunter Hearst Helmsley was killed dead by the returning Ultimate Warrior (who would be gone from the company again four months later and did basically nothing to increase ratings).  A pointless 90-second squash on the biggest PPV of the year.  Warrior infamously informed Hunter backstage, "I'm beating you in 90 seconds."  Things would get worse for HHH over the next few months in the wake of his friends Hall & Nash leaving.

Oscar Film Journal: The Racket (1928)

The Oscars may be over for this year, but that doesn't mean the Oscar Film Journal has to stop....


Today I'm once again headed back to the inaugural slate of Best Picture nominees to review the third and final one, Lewis Milestone's The Racket, starring Thomas Meighan and Louis Wolheim.  Produced by Howard Hughes and based on a stage play of the same name, The Racket is a silent gangster film taking place in Prohibition Era Chicago, pitting an idealistic but seasoned police officer against a hardened mob boss.  Backed by the city's corrupt political machine, the gangster Nick Scarsi seems to enjoy complete immunity from legal action, even when his crimes are flagrant and out in the open.  Police Captain James McQuigg is nonetheless determined to bring him down, and in his desperation is even willing to resort to extralegal means to fight fire with fire.  

The History of WWE WrestleMania: XI

This here WrestleMania is what you might call "half-assed."

Hartford Civic Center - 4/2/95

Here's one of those WrestleMania shows that felt nothing like a supercard should.  The HCC was probably the worst venue ever chosen for 'Mania, and while there was nothing out-and-out offensive on the card, it also didn't seem special in any way.

The WWF tried to create a media blitz by featuring Bam Bam Bigelow against NY Giants superstar Lawrence Taylor, much like they featured Mr. T a decade earlier.  The only problem was #1 LT wasn't a household name like Mr. T, and Bam Bam was a midcard heel with little main event credibility.  The fact that this match went on last is astounding.  It was an ok bout, and LT did the best with what little wrestling acumen he possessed.  But this is a perfect example of why non-wrestling celebrities should not be given an in-ring role, especially if they're supposed to be the babyface.  It leads to a no-win situation, as the non-wrestler basically has to win the match to keep the audience happy, but it makes the actual wrestler look incredibly weak when he loses to an untrained guest star.  If anyone with even a modicum of athletic ability can train for a month and beat an established veteran wrestler, what's so difficult about being a trained veteran wrestler?

So.  You're goin' with that as the main event?  Alright then.

The real main event of the show was also the only real bright spot on the card, as former friends Diesel and Shawn Michaels battled for the WWF Title.  Diesel's sudden main event push was the WWF's attempt to recreate the success of Hulk Hogan.  Sadly Kevin Nash had nowhere near the overwhelming fan support Hogan did, and the Hartford crowd actually ended up cheering the breathtaking athletic abilities of Shawn Michaels.  Even in losing the match, Shawn positioned himself as the next main event babyface.

Thursday, March 14, 2024

The History of WWE WrestleMania: X

Well this is more like it.  Moving into the era of The New WWF Generation.....

Madison Square Garden - 3/20/94

For the tenth edition of 'Mania, the WWF returned to the hallowed Madison Square Garden.  This installment featured not one, but two WWF Title matches, as co-Rumble winners Bret Hart and Lex Luger each got a crack at Yokozuna's championship.

However it was the opening bout and a match where Shawn Michaels danced with a ladder that stole the show.

Since Luger won the coin toss to face Yokozuna first (not sure why that's winning exactly, but ok), Bret had to wrestle a secondary match prior to getting his own title shot.  Luckily for everyone, he had just begun a feud with his brother Owen, and the Hart brothers tore the house down in the opening contest.  Famously the brothers had worked out an action-packed, high-flying match but Bret realized the night before the event that a bunch of aerial moves would get Owen cheered instead of booed.  So they scrapped everything and started over.  No complaints from me - this match was twenty minutes of some of the finest wrestling I've ever seen, capped off by a career-making win for Owen. 

Still one of the best matches of all time

One of the weirder matches I've witnessed took place third on the card, as Randy Savage fought Crush in a variation of a Falls Count Anywhere match.  Now I'm not sure if someone in charge was drunk when they came up with this, or if they were just confused by the FCA rules, but in this case the object was to pin your opponent outside the ring, roll back into the ring, and hope the opponent couldn't get back in within 60 seconds.  There were three falls in this match before Crush finally failed to get back within the time limit, which meant that in a 9-minute match, nearly 3 full minutes consisted of one of the wrestlers waiting inside the ring for the other to climb back in.  Did TNA come up with these rules?

Wrestling Do-Overs: WrestleMania IX

Welcome to another edition of Wrestling Do-Overs, where I'll examine a wrestling show or angle and reshape it as I think it should've been (For other examples see my WrestleMania IV and Starrcade '89 editions).  Today I'll be going back and retroactively fixing what is the most widely reviled of all WrestleManias, the ninth edition!


Now let me preface this by saying 'Mania 9 is not my least favorite of them all.  It's certainly not a good show but it had a few decent matches and despite the worst-booked ending ever in the history of wrestling-- nay, entertainment-- nay, humankind, there have been worse installments in WrestleMania history.

But don't think I'm letting this show off the hook.  It was quite clearly a mess and could've been fixed up pretty nicely with only a few adjustments.  So let's first take a look at the lineup and see why it didn't work.


Intercontinental Championship: Shawn Michaels vs. Tatanka - 18:13
The Steiner Brothers vs. The Headshrinkers - 14:22
Doink the Clown vs. Crush - 8:28
Razor Ramon vs. Bob Backlund - 3:45
Tag Team Championship: Money Inc. vs. The Mega-Maniacs - 18:27
Lex Luger vs. Mr. Perfect - 10:56
The Undertaker vs. Giant Gonzalez - 7:33
WWF Championship: Bret Hart vs. Yokozuna - 8:55
WWF Championship: Yokozuna vs. Hulk Hogan - 0:22


Yeesh, that's what passed for a WrestleMania lineup in 1993?  Okay, first let's look at what did work.

To start with, I kinda liked the Roman Colosseum theme - I know, it was corny and led to way too many cheap laughs, but overall I enjoyed the idea of dressing up Caesar's Palace as a Roman arena.  It gave the show a nice sense of pageantry and made it look different from other PPVs and even other WrestleManias.  Could they have left out some of the window dressing, like making the announcers dress up in togas?  Yes.  But overall I didn't have a problem with the theme, and holding the event outside made it feel special.  By the way, the officially announced attendance figure was 16,891.  I call bullshit on that.  Look at this pic below.  No chance in hell did they fit more than 8,000 in that little venue, and that's being generous.

17 thousand people my ass

A few of the matches were good, as I said before.

The opening Shawn Michaels-Tatanka match was solid stuff, and while certainly not one of Shawn's career highlights, was easily the best match Tatanka ever had.  This got a good amount of time (though I would've shortened it to maybe 15 minutes) and Shawn got to steal the show (by default, but still).  The countout ending was weak, but I still like this match.

The Steiners-Headshrinkers bout was another good one.  Rick and Scott had burst on the WWF scene a few months earlier and were way over, and these two teams meshed quite well actually.  I'll never forget the spot where Rick reversed a Doomsday Device-type move by catching Samu in midair and suplexing him off Fatu's shoulders.  Just a sick spot.

This was both craze-balls and amaze-balls

I found Crush vs. Doink inoffensive and mildly entertaining, so I'll leave that one alone.  Doink's psycho clown character was great, and so of course they turned him babyface six months later and he became a throwaway comedy act.  Dipshits.  Anywho, this match can stay just because it furthered a feud.

The History of WWE WrestleMania: IX

A unique presentation couldn't save this show from its abysmal ending....

Caesar's Palace - 4/4/93

What an odd little piece of wrestling lore this event was.  From the Roman-themed venue/set design to the size mismatch of the main event, this installment was nothing if not unique.  It was the first outdoor WrestleMania and the first without both Gorilla Monsoon and Jesse Ventura on commentary - Jim Ross made his WWF debut instead (helluva way to start a new job!).  It also featured a much younger overall roster than previous shows, as quite a few stars made their 'Mania debuts here.

'Mania 9 is considered by many to be the worst of the bunch.  I don't agree with that statement, but it's certainly something of a mess.  The show started out well enough, with a strong I-C match between Shawn Michaels and Tatanka that actually got more time than any other match and featured the added intrigue of Shawn's ex-manager Sherri Martel facing off with Luna Vachon.  Things continued from there with a very good Steiners-Headshrinkers tag match that included one of the crazier spots I'd ever seen - Rick Steiner countering a Doomsday Device by catching Samu midair and nailing a belly-to-belly suplex.  Even Crush vs. Doink was passable in slot three - a goofy but sort of enjoyable brawl showcasing Doink's diabolical heel antics.

The show took a downturn with the bewilderingly short Bob Backlund vs. Razor Ramon, and then became a total clusterfuck as Money Inc. took on the returning Hulk Hogan and Brutus Beefcake for the Tag belts.  The match dragged on for 18 minutes and was painful to watch, and ended with a DQ win for Money Inc.  Sadly this would not be the last we saw of Hogan that night.

Lex Luger vs. Mr. Perfect looked spectacular on paper but failed to crack 2-star territory, and the Undertaker vs. Giant Gonzales flat-out stunk up the place.

One of the most disappointing matches ever

Which brings us to the WWF title match.  What a bizarre main event - an established smaller workhorse against a totally unproven 500-pounder.  Bret Hart managed to get a quite entertaining little match out of Yokozuna, and then everything went to hell.

Wednesday, March 13, 2024

The History of WWE WrestleMania: VIII

WrestleMania returns to a stadium for a show that was half-great....

HoosierDome - 4/5/92

'Mania returned to a more fitting venue in 1992, as the WWF took over the HoosierDome in Indianapolis.  This stadium actually resembles a smaller Silverdome, so it made 'Mania 8 feel like a big deal.  The influx of new headliners, fresh matchups, and the double main event certainly didn't hurt either.

Seemingly the obvious main event for the 8th edition was Ric Flair vs. Hulk Hogan for the WWF Title.  It was the biggest dream match in the business, and throughout the 80s fans speculated on who was the bigger star.  Unfortunately the WWF somehow blew the whole thing by presenting this gigantic matchup with little fanfare, on a series of 1991 house shows.  And the match evidently didn't blow anyone's skirt up.  Couple that with Hogan deciding to take some time off in 1992, and the big dream match was off for WrestleMania.

Instead Flair defended the Title against a much more skilled opponent in Randy Savage, and Hogan once again tried to duplicate the Hogan-Andre dynamic by wrestling Sid Justice.

The WWF Title match was excellent and became the strongest WWF Title match in WrestleMania history at that time.  Flair and Savage put on a classic seesaw match that would launch the Macho Man back to the top of the roster.  Bafflingly, this match was not put in the main event slot, which sort of robbed Savage of his glorious WrestleMania moment.  Flair-Savage was fifth on the card of nine matches, and unfortunately everything that followed it was mediocre or worse.

Great shot.  Great match too.

The History of WWE WrestleMania: VII

It's a Star-Spangled WrestleMania.....in a tiny venue....

L.A. Sports Arena - 3/24/91

The seventh installment ended up being one of the most forgettable.  What was intended to be a record-smashing supershow in front of 100,000 fans at the L.A. Coliseum was relegated to the 15,000-seat Sports Arena when ticket sales fell horribly short of expectations.  That will happen though when your main event is little more than the exploitation of a minor real-life skirmish in the Middle East.  Why the WWF thought the US vs. Iraq angle would draw big business I'm not sure, especially since the real conflict ended over a month before WrestleMania.

Sgt. Slaughter was inexplicably brought in as a turncoat and almost immediately handed the WWF Title at the Royal Rumble, all so he could face the American Hero Hulk Hogan.  Surely a Hogan vs. Warrior rematch would've drawn the numbers they wanted, so I'm still unclear why they didn't go that route.

The match was what it was.  It certainly could've been worse, but it definitely wasn't good.  It's widely considered one of, if not THE worst all-time WrestleMania main event.  Slaughter was about as unworthy a WWF Champion as there's ever been and it was a sad day indeed when Hulk Hogan is by far the better worker in a given match.  This meandering brawl lasted over 21 minutes before Hogan mercifully put an end to the proceeding with the ol' big boot-legdrop combo.  Sadly this didn't even end the feud, as it stretched on and off until SummerSlam.  Christ almighty.....

Yep.  Can't imagine why this didn't sell 100,000 tickets.

'Mania 7 was saved however by the semi-main event of Randy Savage vs. The Ultimate Warrior, with the stipulation that the loser would have to retire.  This feud had been brewing for several months while Warrior was WWF Champion, but Savage was battling nagging injuries and was thus unable to compete for a while.  Though I don't consider this match nearly as great as most do, it was easily one of the WWF's best of 1991.  This match paved the way for the overuse of finishers in big matchups (see Austin vs. Rock).  Savage hit five flying elbow smashes in a row and failed to get the pin, and the Warrior finally won after three flying tackles.  Post-match Savage's manager Sherri Martel attacked him, having lost her meal ticket due to the retirement stip.  Who should come to Savage's rescue but Miss Elizabeth, much to the delight and tears of the crowd.  Savage would spend the next several months as a commentator before returning to action that November.

Tuesday, March 12, 2024

The History of WWE WrestleMania: VI

In my opinion the worst WrestleMania of all time.  Fight me.....

The Skydome - 4/1/90

'Mania returned to a stadium setting in 1990, with a gigantic face vs. face main event for both of the singles championships.  Hulk Hogan vs. Ultimate Warrior was arguably an even bigger match than Hogan vs. Savage, in that it had never happened before and featured the company's top two babyfaces head to head.

The match itself was similar in style to the Hogan-Savage match from a year earlier, except it lacked a great wrestler to carry the workload.  Hogan and Warrior did what they could, but two mediocre wrestlers squaring off for 20+ minutes can only do so much.  While the aura surrounding the match was pretty epic, the match itself always left me rather bored, and I consider it one of the more overrated matches in WWF/E history.  It was notable however for being one of the few times Hulk Hogan ever jobbed cleanly.  This was a true passing of the torch (which unfortunately didn't really stick, but that's beside the point); a rare example of Hogan acting unselfishly and putting his stamp of approval on a would-be successor.

A titanic battle.....between two mediocre workers.

The History of WWE WrestleMania: V

The first WrestleMania I was able to watch live as it happened, via closed-circuit television....

Trump Plaza - 4/2/89

Oh we're still in this weird convention center, are we?  The fifth installment marked the first and only time the supercard was held in the same arena two years in a row.  'Mania 5 was also a 4-hour card and featured 14 matches.  This show succeeded where IV failed however in showcasing a mammoth featured bout, as former allies Hulk Hogan and Randy Savage collided for the WWF Title.

Hogan-Savage was the first WrestleMania main event that was actually a strong wrestling match, and also the first to exceed the fifteen minute mark.  If Savage-Steamboat was the prototypical WWF workrate clinic, Hogan-Savage was the model for how to do an epic WWF main event match.  It was full of action, reversals, drama and intrique, and until the inevitably stupid "hulk-up" comeback/no-sell in the final minute, it was one of the best matches of 1989.  It was also the 18-month culmination of one of the best story arcs in wrestling history: the formation, ascension, and eventual implosion of the MegaPowers.  This was a brilliantly executed angle from start to finish.  Unfortunately Savage's stock was pretty damaged by this feud and he spent the next couple years as just another guy.

Savage looks less than thrilled about being tossed out of the main event picture.

The WrestleMania Intercontinental Title match somewhat returned to form as the Ultimate Warrior faced Rick Rude in a near show-stealer.  Their Summerslam rematch five months later would overshadow the initial clash, but this is still a fine undercard match with a great cheap ending - Warrior went to suplex Rude from the apron into the ring when Bobby Heenan tripped Warrior and held his leg down, allowing Rude to fall on top of him for the pin.

WrestleMania V was another show that simply had too much going on (a pattern that would continue for a couple more years), and a few trims to the lineup could've made this a much stronger overall card (Did we really need Heenan vs. Red Rooster, Dino Bravo vs. Ronnie Garvin, or Jim Duggan vs. Bad News Brown?).  Still there were a lot of fun little matches.  The opener, Hercules vs. King Haku was better than it had any right to be, Mr. Perfect vs. Blue Blazer was a solid showcase of unorthodox offense, the Hart Foundation vs. Honky Tonk & Valentine was a nice tag match, and the Rockers' 'Mania debut against the Twin Towers ended up as a very enjoyable size mismatch and one of the best bouts of the night.

Shawn's first WrestleMania

Monday, March 11, 2024

Wrestling Do-Overs: WWF WrestleMania IV

What up fools?  Welcome to Wrestling Do-Overs, where I'll take a famous pro wrestling card or angle and reimagine it the way I would've booked it.

Today I'll be talking about WrestleMania IV, which took place March 27, 1988 at Trump Plaza in Atlantic City.  This show is best remembered for the first-ever WWF Title tournament which saw Randy "Macho Man" Savage win four matches to become the new Champion.  Now all that is great, but the show itself from a wrestling standpoint, well.....kinda sucked.  They tried to cram sixteen matches on a four-hour PPV, only one of which lasted more than twelve minutes (that being a terribly dull fifteen-minute draw in the first round).  There was simply too much going on and not enough time for any of the individual matches to properly deliver.


So I'm going to overhaul the card and present it the way I think it should've gone down.  Before I do though, let's look at the card the way it actually transpired:


Plus:

20-Man Battle Royal
Honky Tonk Man vs. Brutus Beefcake
Ultimate Warrior vs. Hercules
British Bulldogs/Koko B. Ware vs. Islanders/Bobby Heenan
Strike Force vs. Demolition

See what I mean?  There just wasn't enough good wrestling going on, and even the tournament final/main event was an overbooked nine-minute mess when it should've been a potential Match of the Year.

So first off, let's change the 14-man tournament to an 8-man.  Now I know what you're thinking; but Justin, Hulk Hogan and Andre the Giant are supposed to get a bye into the second round!  And they still do; Hogan and Andre are automatically entered into the tournament, whereas the remaining six competitors have to win qualifying matches on WWF Superstars of Wrestling in the weeks leading up to the show. 


Tournament Qualifiers

Ted Dibiase defeats Don Muraco
Jim Duggan defeats One Man Gang
Randy Savage defeats Butch Reed
Ricky Steamboat defeats Greg Valentine
Jake Roberts defeats Dino Bravo
Rick Rude defeats Bam Bam Bigelow

So your first-round bracket looks like this:

The History of WWE WrestleMania: IV

Continuing with Enuffa.com's History of WrestleMania, today I'll be covering the one edition that featured a championship tournament.  And it ended up kind of a bloated mess....

Trump Plaza - 3/27/88

'Mania IV was assembled with the intent of giving us the biggest edition to date, with the centerpiece being the first-ever WWF World Title tournament, the result of a controversial Hulk Hogan-Andre the Giant match on NBC that saw Hogan screwed out of the Championship only for Andre to turn around and sell the belt to Ted Dibiase.  WrestleMania IV featured a huge roster and was expanded to three-and-a-half hours to accommodate the sprawling 16-match card.

Unfortunately this show suffered from simply having too much going on, not to mention some absolutely terrible booking.  The tournament involved 14 men and all by itself necessitated 11 matches.  As a result almost none of the tourney matches, including the final, were given enough time to be very memorable.  The venue is also a far cry from the Silverdome, Trump Plaza being a rather cavernous arena where the crowd consisted largely of Donald Trump's business associates who showed almost no enthusiasm for the four-hour wrestling bonanza.

This was goofy fun

The undercard featured a battle royal (which was fun but of little importance except as a way to turn Bret Hart babyface after he was doublecrossed by Bad News Brown), Ultimate Warrior vs. Hercules in a clash of powerhouses (which was so short as to barely warrant a mention), a British Bulldogs/Koko vs. Islanders/Bobby Heenan six-man tag, nowhere near as good as the previous year's Bulldogs-Harts match, which ended in similar fashion with the non-wrestler pinning one of the Bulldogs.  Those poor Bulldogs....

There were also two title matches - I-C Champion The Honky Tonk Man faced the wildly popular Brutus Beefcake in a brief and forgettable DQ loss, while Strike Force and Demolition was one of the few strong matches on the card, ending with Ax murdering Rick Martel with Mr. Fuji's cane in a finish very similar to the WrestleMania I Tag Title match.  Thus began Demolition's record-breaking title run.

The WWF Title tournament itself was fine in theory but very poor in execution.  Only four of the 14 participants really had a chance of leaving 'Mania as the Champion, and two of them were eliminated in their first match.  The Hogan vs. Andre quarterfinal bout marked the first time a WrestleMania featured a rematch from the previous year.  Sadly where their 1987 encounter was extremely memorable and has achieved legendary status, its 1988 threequel was little more than a throwaway designed to get both men out of the tournament (via a clumsy-as-shit double disqualification after Hogan hit Andre with a chair, then Andre hit Hogan with the same chair).  Really the only standout match in this entire tourney was the first-round match between Ricky Steamboat and Greg Valentine.  Everything else was either too short (Bam Bam Bigelow vs. One Man Gang for example, which ended when OMG refused to let Bam Bam back into the ring and the referee inexplicably counted Bigelow out), inoffensive but instantly forgettable (Dibiase vs. Don Muraco), or yawn-inducing (Jake Roberts vs. Rick Rude, which took place after their feud-inciting angle involving Jake's wife was taped, but before it aired).

Friday, March 8, 2024

96th Academy Awards Preview & Predictions

It's Oscar time, folks!  And that means that for the ninth time my colleague Mike Drinan and I will regale you with our predictions for who wins what awards!






Best Picture



Justin: This year is special for me, as for the first time in my life thus far, I've actually seen every Best Picture nominee ahead of time.  Holy jeez, I feel so accomplished.  Anyway I enjoyed all ten films on some level.  Barbie is a lot of fun and has a good message, Maestro is a compellingly intimate look at an esteemed but troubled artist, Past Lives deals with the issue of childhood romance vs. mature relationships, Killers of the Flower Moon is an epic look at the atrocities committed against the Osage nation, The Zone of Interest is a tiny-scope look at the atrocities of the Holocaust, Anatomy of a Fall is a fascinating procedural that tackles gender inequality in the legal system, American Fiction is a quietly hilarious satire on race in art, The Holdovers is a funny and often touching coming-of-age story, Poor Things is a demented but brilliantly crafted feminist parable, and Oppenheimer is a massive cinematic achievement and a reinvention of the biopic.  For once my favorite nominee is also the odds-on favorite.

Pick: Oppenheimer


Mike: I’ve only seen four of the nominees this year which is pretty pathetic considering how many really good films came out this year. Really looking forward to sitting down with Poor Things and The Zone of Interest, also heard great things about Anatomy of a Fall. I really enjoyed Killers of the Flower Moon with its harsh look at the crimes committed against the Osage and loved Jason Isbell’s acting as well, definitely a highlight for me. The Holdovers was great simply because Paul Giamatti is a frigging acting giant. I feel like Barbie is getting shorted in the discussion of nominees. The spin that film presented was a stroke of genius. I know we cringe when we agree, but it’s hard to deny Oppenheimer. It was not only a brilliant biopic, but it checks off all the boxes for the Oscars.

Pick: Oppenheimer


The History of WWE WrestleMania: III

The one edition that's totally critic-proof....

Pontiac Silverdome - 3/29/87

Now we're talkin'.  WrestleMania III was, and possibly still is, the biggest wrestling supercard of all time.  Arguably no single wrestling match has carried the sheer magnitude or mainstream appeal of Hogan vs. Andre.  There's a consensus among wrestling fans who grew up with this show: When it comes to WrestleMania III, star ratings need not apply.

Let's be honest, Hogan vs. Andre is a terrible, terrible match from an in-ring standpoint.  Had that been Dan Spivey vs. Big John Studd performing the exact same match, it would've been booed like X-Pac and ranked high on the all-time DUD list.  But somehow the mediocre Hogan and the damn near immobile Andre captured the imagination of everyone on that night, and delivered the best and most memorable awful match in history which climaxed with The Bodyslam Heard 'Round the World.

On the other end of the workrate spectrum lay the #2 draw of the night, Randy Savage vs. Ricky Steamboat.  What can I say that hasn't been said already?  It's an all-time classic; a near-perfect match that has stood the test of time and then some. 'Mania 3 is remembered just as much for this match as for Hogan-Andre, and it became the prototype for the WWF-style five-star match.  Sadly Steamboat's planned long-term Intercontinental Title run was derailed when he asked for a reduced schedule to focus on his newborn son, and this would be his last great WWF match.

Goddamn this match is 17 kinds of awesome.

Thursday, March 7, 2024

The History of WWE WrestleMania: 2

For the first and only time, WrestleMania emanates from multiple venues....

Nassau Coliseum/Rosemont Horizon/L.A. Sports Arena - 4/7/86

'Mania 2 was possibly the strangest of them all.  It took place from three different locations on a Monday(!) night.  The multi-venue format was clearly in response to Jim Crockett's Starrcade '85 being broadcast from two venues a few months earlier.  Three is bigger than two I guess, so Vince opted for a live one-hour card from three different time zones.  Unfortunately this made for a rather uneven show, and worse, the commentary suffered as the A-crew was split up and paired with B-level commentators and/or celebrities who knew nothing about the product.

Each hour of the show featured a main event match, preceded by three undercard matches (some of which were oddly truncated to the point that their inclusion at all is rather baffling).

The Nassau portion of the show was easily the weakest, headlined by a worked boxing match between Piper and Mr. T.  There is little in the sports-entertainment business that is less exciting to me than pretend boxing.  It simply doesn't work, especially when neither participant is particularly good at it.  Neither of them looked like legitimate fighters and the match was little more than a barrage of pulled punches.  An actual wrestling match could have been much more entertaining.

Wow, this stunk...

The first third of the show was notable for the WrestleMania debuts of Randy Savage and Jake Roberts, neither of whom really got to show what they were capable of.  The opening match on this show was probably the most disappointing, as on paper Don Muraco vs. Paul Orndorff looks pretty good.  Sadly they were only given about 4 minutes and they went to a rushed double countout.  Savage's match was by default the best of the Nassau portion, but it was little more than a comedic spectacle as his opponent George "The Animal" Steele was so uncontrollable.

The History of WWE WrestleMania: I

Hello and welcome to this special Enuffa.com blog, The History of WrestleMania!  This series will discuss and dissect all 36 previous installments of the annual supercard and determine what I feel were the highlights and lowlights each year.

WrestleMania season is usually one of my favorite times of the year, and I always find myself reflecting back on the storied history of this great spectacle.  I think about some of my favorite 'Mania matches, what makes a great 'Mania card, and why some shows were so successful while others really don't deserve to fall under the WrestleMania banner.  For the record, I'm writing this piece completely from memory, which should give you some idea of how sad and twisted I am.

So without further prattling on, let's get to it.


Madison Square Garden - 3/31/85

This of course was the show that started it all.  The great McMahon gamble that paid off not in spades, but truckloads of money.  This was one of the first truly mainstream wrestling events on a national scale, and the hype allowed the WWF to break into the pop culture vernacular.

Surprisingly though, the inaugural 'Mania card more resembled a house show than a true supercard.  For one thing, having a tag team match as the main event rather than a WWF Title match seems like such an odd choice.  Hulk Hogan's ongoing feud with Roddy Piper was such a draw it seems like a singles match for the belt would be the natural main event.  However the WWF put that match on MTV that February as a way to hype 'Mania.  Clearly it worked, but it made for kind of a watered-down main event for the supercard.  Hogan/Mr. T vs. Piper/Orndorff was fine for what it was, but I hardly consider it a classic.

I always dug this poster for some reason.
These two guys together would beat Rocky Balboa's ass!

This match also began the trend of celebrities getting involved in big money matches as actual competitors.  It occurs to me that the match would've been greatly improved by swapping T out for Jimmy Snuka.  But I suppose seeing T wrestle was part of the draw.  Mr. T certainly looked like he could hang in the ring with the actual wrestlers but I've always felt that having celebs wrestle damages the business somewhat.  More on that later....

The show was also not very stacked for such a marquee event.  To be fair, the WWF's roster would expand considerably after this show (Savage and Jake would arrive, the Hart Foundation and the British Bulldogs would form).  Elsewhere on the card we had Andre the Giant vs. Big John Studd in a bodyslam challenge (again, this felt watered-down since it wasn't a traditional wrestling match but ended when one man bodyslammed the other) which aside from the spectacle was just two nearly immobile guys plodding through a short match.

The first 'Mania also inexplicably featured several glorified squashes.  Tito Santana vs. The Executioner opened the show and was roughly the kind of match you'd see on Wrestling Challenge.  King Kong Bundy vs. S.D. Jones and Ricky Steamboat vs. Matt Borne also fell into that category.  Hardly worthy of the biggest show of all-time (at that point anyway).

First match in WrestleMania history

Wednesday, March 6, 2024

Oscar Film Journal: Poor Things (2023)

Welcome to the Oscar Film Journal, here at Enuffa.com!  Well, I did it, I actually managed to see all ten Best Picture nominees before the awards, for the first time ever.  WOO HOO!


And I picked a helluva movie to finish up with.  Yorgos Lanthimos's latest bizzaro cinematic feast is called Poor Things and stars Emma Stone, Mark Ruffalo and Willem Dafoe.  Based on a 1992 novel by Alasdair Gray, the film is part Frankenstein adaptation, part feminist hero's journey.  It's also demented, grotesque, often hilariously funny, and one of the best and most original films of the year.  

Dafoe, buried under hideous scar makeup, plays Dr. Godwin Baxter, a surgeon who conducts insane and illegal experiments, the latest of which involves reanimating the body of a pregnant woman who threw herself off a bridge, by putting the unborn baby's brain in the woman's head.  Thus is the origin story of the film's protagonist Bella, who when we first meet her is just learning crude motor skills and speech patterns.  Baxter brings in a medical student, Max, to essentially help raise this child-woman, and he unexpectedly falls in love with her.  Max asks to marry her and Godwin agrees, but insists that Bella never be allowed to leave the Baxter home, as he doesn't think she could survive in the outside world.  But Bella begins experiencing an intellectual and sexual awakening and decides to run off with Godwin's lawyer Duncan, and the pair travel around Europe, an adventure which opens Bella to all sorts of life experiences as her brain matures.

Tuesday, March 5, 2024

Oscar Film Journal: 7th Heaven (1927)

And another entry in the Oscar Film Journal, here at Enuffa.com!


Going waaaaay back almost a century to the first trio of films nominated for the prestigious Best Picture award, today I'll be talking about one of the two runners-up that year, 7th Heaven, a silent era romantic drama/war picture directed by Frank Borzage and starring Janet Gaynor and Charles Farrell.  Based on a stage play and set in France at the start of World War I, 7th Heaven starts by introducing Chico (Farrell), a lowly sewer worker who dreams of being a street cleaner and getting to toil all day in the sunlight as opposed to underground.  At the same time we meet Diane (Gaynor), a prostitute with a heart of gold, who lives in squalor with her abusive sister.  When their rich uncle offers to take them away to live with him as long as Diane can promise they've been wholesome young women, Diane can't bring herself to lie to him, and he rescinds.  Diane's sister chases her into the street and proceeds to beat her, when Chico comes to the rescue.  A policeman threatens to arrest Diane, but Chico lies and says she's his wife.  To keep up the pretense, Chico must let Diane live with him in his seventh-floor walk-up until the police can schedule a follow-up to confirm her residence.  Of course the pair inevitably fall in love, but just as they decide to get married, war breaks out and Chico must go off to fight.

Monday, March 4, 2024

AEW Revolution 2024 Review: An All-Timer

For the third straight year AEW has delivered a Revolution PPV that is unlikely to be topped the rest of this calendar year.  After the second match I said to my wife "Bryan Danielson just shit out another classic."  And that ended up the third-best match on the show.  No one does PPV like AEW does PPV....


Revolution was of course built around the retirement of 64-year-old legend Sting, and while his match delivered about as well as anyone could ever want, there were so many great bouts on this show it was actually an embarrassment of riches.  The 16,000+ fans were molten for most of the PPV, the only real lull being the Women's Title match, which still kept them interested.  Think about how rock-solid a lineup needs to be for anyone to follow Ospreay-Takeshita for example and still have the crowd eating out of the wrestlers' hands.  I don't ever want to hear anyone say a wrestling show needs buffer matches or long gaps between bouts to let the crowd catch their breath; this show was wall-to-wall wrestling and the crowd ate it up.

The main show kicked off with Christian Cage vs. Daniel Garcia for the TNT Title and the crowd was very much behind the idea of Garcia taking the title off him.  Garcia outwrestled Cage early, but Cage took over after faking a knee injury.  Garcia would target Cage's ankle to soften him up for the anklelock.  Nick Wayne tried to interfere but Garcia sent him over the barricade.  Killswitch hit a chokeslam behind the referee's back, but Daddy Magic ran down and fought him up the ramp.  Cage went for a spear but his ankle buckled and Garcia hit a piledriver for a nearfall.  Shayna Wayne distracted the ref long enough for Nick to run in with a cutter, and Cage hit the Killswitch to finish Garcia off.  Damn good opener.  ****

Oscar Film Journal: Triangle of Sadness (2022)

Turning another page in the Oscar Film Journal, here at Enuffa.com!


Another film I missed from 2022, today's nominee is the pitch-black satirical comedy (a word I use loosely for this film) Triangle of Sadness, from Swedish director Ruben Östlund.  How to describe the plot....  It's basically the story of a luxury cruise involving a group of vapid, obscenely wealthy passengers, that goes horribly wrong.  Spoiler alert, by the way.

The film is split into three acts, the first of which focuses on a young couple, Carl and Yaya, both professional models, who date more for the social media engagement than for love.  Or at least that's how Yaya feels.  She's a very successful model and influencer, he's on his way up but earns a fraction of her salary.  And they get into a heated argument after dinner at an upscale restaurant, when the check comes and she ignores it.  Carl reminds her that she promised to pay for the meal but Yaya insists she didn't notice the check had arrived, having been fixated by her phone at the time.  The spat continues in the cab and all the way back to their hotel room, where Carl tells her he actually loves her and promises she'll come to love him back.

Friday, March 1, 2024

Oscar Film Journal: Hacksaw Ridge (2016)

Welcome back to the Oscar Film Journal, here at Enuffa.com!


Backing up to the 2016 slate of Best Pic nominees and one I never got around to seeing at the time, today's subject is Hacksaw Ridge, directed by Mel Gibson and starring Andrew Garfield and Vince Vaughn.  The film tells the kinda sorta true story of Desmond Doss, a World War II medic who earned a Medal of Honor for saving 75 of his fellow troops at the Battle of Okinawa.  A conscientious objector and Seventh-day Adventist Christian, Doss refused to carry a rifle and fought hard during training to be allowed to stay in the military as a pacifist medic, at one point facing a court martial for insubordination.

The film is split into two halves, the first covering Doss's troubled upbringing and first experiences with violence; his father was a World War I vet with PSTD and a violent alcoholic (played pretty superbly by Hugo Weaving).  We learn that as a child he nearly killed his brother while rough housing, and his regret stemming from that incident remained throughout his life.  A later confrontation with his father involving a gun left him with a severe aversion to firearms, hence his refusal to use one while in the military.  This half of the film uses a lot of familiar movie tropes - the awkward budding romance, the forceful drill instructor (Vaughn, whose status as a goofball comedian makes him less than intimidating here), the goofy misfit bullied by his unit.  None of this material is particularly profound, but Garfield's performance makes most of it work, at least on a Hollywood level.

Thursday, February 29, 2024

AEW Revolution 2024 Preview & Predictions: Sting's Last Match

It's that time, folks.  The final wrestling match of the legendary Sting!  


That's right, after five best-selling albums with The Police and a slew of Grammy-winning solo records, Gordon Sumner is finally hanging up his wrestling boots, and.....

Wait, what?  It's....he's not the same....it's a different Sting?  Oh....uhh......alright.....

That's right, after nearly forty years, numerous historic world championship reigns and iconic moments and matches, Steve Borden is finally hanging up his wrestling boots, and it's happening in an AEW ring!  Sting for me was always one of those wrestlers I was never that into as a kid, but the older I get and the more like wine he's aged, the more respect I've developed for him.  By all accounts he's a true gentleman behind the makeup, gracious and humble, and over the years he's gone to great lengths to reinvent himself and stay fresh.  At just shy of 65 years old he moves like a man 10-15 years his junior, and takes absolutely insane risks to prove he still belongs in there with the young fellas.  And this Sunday it all culminates in the same building where Sting put himself on the map 36 years earlier, the Greensboro Coliseum, site of the first NWA Clash of the Champions show.  The atmosphere alone, amid a crowd of 16,000+, should be very special. 

And the card itself is pretty damn solid too.  This show is one of the more difficult ones to predict for me.  Let's get into it....



All-Star Scramble: Wardlow vs. Powerhouse Hobbs vs. Chris Jericho vs. Brian Cage vs. Dante Martin vs. Magnus vs. Hook vs. Lance Archer


This was thrown together last-minute as a substitute for the intended Meat Madness (obviously intended to be a buncha huge guys beating the shit out of each other), but some of the slated participants were unavailable.  So it's a...Fatal 8-Way, I guess?  Anyway the winner gets a title shot.  So unless it's to be just a throwaway match on free TV you can rule out Lance, Magnus, Dante, and probably Cage.  Hook just had a match with Joe so it's probably too soon to go back to that well.  That leaves Jericho, Hobbs and Wardlow.  And of those three, Wardlow is the only one talking about going after the champ, so we'll go with him to win.  Hard to say what to do with Wardlow right now, as it all depends on when Adam Cole and MJF are coming back.  Cole said he wanted Wardlow to win the title and give it to him, and Wardlow and MJF still have unfinished business.  You could have MJF appeal to Wardlow as a real friend this time and turn him against Cole.  "Adam is using you the same way I was, trust me, it takes a scumbag to know a scumbag."  That sorta thing.  But ol' Wardlow needs to have his spark reignited.  

Pick: Wardlow




TNT Championship: Christian Cage vs. Daniel Garcia


This is a weird one, is Adam Copeland not available on Sunday?  It felt like they were heading for another Cope-Cage rematch but now it's Garcia in this spot.  I'm not complaining, the match should be very good.  But does Copeland interfere to cost Cage the match so Garcia can move on with the title and Cope vs. Cage can just be a grudge match?  Maybe Copeland doesn't want a title?  Or does Matt Menard turn on Garcia, allowing Cage to win again, and Copeland challenges him one more time?  Tough one here.  I guess if Copeland is around Sunday it doesn't make sense for him not to be on the card, so maybe it's the latter?

Pick: Cage retains

Friday, February 23, 2024

Oscar Film Journal: The Martian (2015)

And we're back with yet another Oscar Film Journal entry, here at Enuffa.com!


Set your time machine for 2015, because we're going all the way back to Ridley Scott's sci-fi drama-comedy(?), The Martian, starring Matt Damon, Jessica Chastain, Jeff Daniels, Kristen Wiig, Chiwetel Ejiofor and a host of other recognizable supporting actors.  Essentially a desert island movie set in space, The Martian tells a simple and familiar story but does so with great attention to detail, a lighthearted sense of humor, and some stunningly convincing special effects.  The film is set in the not-too-distant future where NASA has begun sending manned missions to Mars, and during one such mission a dust storm sends an AV unit crashing into one of the astronauts, presumably killing him.  His team evacuates the planet before the storm disables their ship, and heads back toward Earth.  But Mark Watney is still alive and now must figure out how to survive on a barren planet until the next Mars mission arrives in four years.  Through video diary entries and fun montages we watch Damon's character try to tame this hostile environment, supplementing the team's food stores with potatoes he grows inside the habitat, fertilized with the team's frozen excrement.  Back on Earth though, NASA uses satellite images to deduce Watney is still alive and scrambles to plan a rescue mission.

Oscar Film Journal: The Zone of Interest (2023)

Nine down, one to go!  Welcome to another Oscar Film Journal, here at Enuffa.com....


Jonathan Glazer's The Zone of Interest is unlike any other film you'll ever see about the Holocaust.  Told entirely from the point of view of Nazi Commandant Rudolph Höss (Christian Friedel) and his family, stationed in an affluent home adjacent to the Auschwitz concentration camp, the film is startlingly dispassionate in its depiction of the most heinous of war crimes.  Höss takes his family swimming, goes horseback riding, gets a boat for his birthday, throws backyard parties, leads a typical well-to-do suburban lifestyle.  And just over the garden wall plumes of smoke float up from the incinerators next door.  Höss's young son mimics the mechanical furnace sounds they hear all night, his daughter has trouble sleeping and watches the orange glow of the fires through a hallway window, but aside from his wife pilfering the occasional stolen fur coat and his older son examining his collection of gold teeth, this family scarcely acknowledges the unfathomable horrors taking place in their own backyard.

Thursday, February 22, 2024

WWE Elimination Chamber 2024 Preview & Predictions

Sigh....I'm not sure why I'm still covering WWE PPVs right now given how much awful shit has come out about that company and some of the people still working there, but here we go....


This Saturday the Elimination Chamber emanates from Perth, Australia, and like the Royal Rumble the card consists of the two gimmick matches plus two other matches.  As usual the Chamber matches will be a rather toothless affair since there's no blood allowed and the company substitutes weapons and occasional high spots for brutality, but there's enough talent in both matches that they should be pretty entertaining.  Aside from that we have a women's title match with a forgone conclusion, and a tag title match with a forgone conclusion (though that one should be excellent).

Let's take a look.



WWE Tag Team Championship: Finn Balor & Damian Priest vs. Pete Dunne & Tyler Bate


Thank Christ Pete Dunne gets to use his real ring name again.  That "Butch" stuff was fucking stupid.  Because most of Vince's creative ideas are fucking stupid.  Fuck that guy for all eternity.  Sorry, back on track.  This should be a helluva match; the challengers are fantastic wrestlers and the champs aren't too shabby either.  In fact I'd be shocked if this doesn't steal the show.  Give these guys 15-20 minutes and let 'em fly.

Pick: Champs obviously retain