WWE Survivor Series 2023 Review: CM Punk is "Home"

WWE Survivor Series 2023, like most WWE PPVs nowadays, was....a show.  Neither bad, nor particularly good.  It was a series of competently worked matches that, like so many McDonald's meals, goes in one orifice and out another, without much joy or artistry.  The most memorable thing about this show was of course the return of CM Punk, but even that was just "famous guy comes out and stands there, crowd cheers."  And the followup to it two days later consisted of Punk cutting probably the least memorable promo of his entire career, as he stood in a WWE ring for the first time in a decade (a decade during which he repeatedly and vociferously attacked WWE and its product), and declared "I'm home."  Oh and "I missed you fans (even though I actually came back to wrestling two years ago and have spent plenty of time in your presence since then)."

But back to Survivor Series, as I stated in my predictions piece, WWE WarGames matches really do nothing for me.  They're a spectacle without any real substance.  Wrestlers take turns getting into the cage, some stuff happens, most of it involving kendo sticks (Can someone explain to me why this random Asian weapon has become WWE's favorite, and why there would ever be a slew of these damn things under the ring all the time?), and then someone gets pinned, so much tamer than one team torturing an opponent until they surrender, as was the original rule.  WarGames simply doesn't need to be an annual event, just like Hell in a Cell doesn't.  Both should be reserved for when a feud between two parties is so heated and bloodthirsty it can only be settled in this foreboding structure.  And there needs to be blood.  Sorry, that's just the reality of the situation.  If you want me to believe in the savagery of the WarGames gimmick, the participants need to look like they've been through a war.  AEW's Blood and Guts conveys this every time, because the matches are a bloody, violent car wreck.  When it's over I buy into the idea that these folks risked life and limb to settle a score.  After a WarGames match is over it's just business as usual.  The mat is pristine and everyone looks like they just finished a game of touch football.  You can't expect me to believe I've just witnessed the ultimate in pro wrestling barbarism.  I've said it before, but traditional elimination matches would suit this company and this event so much better than their feeble attempts at brutality.

AEW Full Gear 2023: The Texas Death Match from Hell

AEW Full Gear 2023 was another strong entry in the company's banner PPV year, definitely not on the level of their best output but a highly enjoyable show nonetheless.  Like all AEW PPVs the matches were all very different and most of them were hits.  The biggest issue with Full Gear had nothing to do with the in-ring, but rather with the booking of the evening-long storyline leading to the main event.

Yes, in order to create some suspense over whether or not MJF would survive the night as AEW Champion, they booked a rather convoluted, logic-defying angle wherein it was doubtful MJF would even be able to compete.  His pre-show tag team partner did indeed turn out to be Samoa Joe, and the duo made pretty short work of the Gunns to retain the ROH Tag belts.  But post-match the Gunns attacked MJF, Pillmanizing his knee and sending him to the hospital on a stretcher.  What followed was an early-show announcement that MJF would be unable to wrestle, and just as Tony Schiavone was about to declare Jay White the new Champion by forfeit, Adam Cole interrupted to say that he would defend the title in Max's stead.  Hold up though, how can a man with a just-repaired shattered ankle get cleared for a title match if Max couldn't?  That part didn't make sense and it cast a bit of a pall over the rest of the show until MJF of course returned to the arena at the last minute.  It reminded me of Attitude Era Vince Russo booking.  What should've happened was simply numerous announcements of "We don't know Max's status," followed by Jay White coming down for his match and announcing himself as the new champion, only to be interrupted by MJF's entrance.  Keep things simple.

Anyway, aside from that mess there was a lot to like about this show, including one of the most brutal Texas Death matches you'll ever see, plus the announced signing of Will Ospreay when his NJPW contract expires in February (Holy shit, the matches this guy can have with everyone on the AEW roster...).

The show opened with the big trios bout, pitting Sting, Darby Allin and Adam Copeland against Christian Cage, Luchasaurus and Nick Wayne.  This was a very fun, energetic six-man, with the main story being Copeland's varied attempts to get his hands on his old partner, which of course never materialized.  The two squads waged a war of attrition that ultimately left Luchasaurus and Wayne incapacitated, and just when it looked like Copeland would get some payback against Cage, Christian ran like a coward into the crowd, ditching his partners.  The three babyfaces then hit Luchasaurus with multiple finishers, capped off by Darby's Coffin Drop.  Copeland covered him for the win, and during the celebration Darby alerted the fans that this was Sting's last-ever match in the state of California.  Good stuff to kick things off.  ***3/4

WWE Survivor Series 2023 Preview & Predictions

Sigh.....I miss actual Survivor Series.  Remember how awesome that gimmick was?  So much fun.  Like wrestling's Pro Bowl game....

Oh, hello there!  Welcome to our WWE Survivor Series: WarGames 2023 preview!

Am I the only one who has no real interest in WWE's version of WarGames anymore?  It was fun when they brought it back in NXT because we hadn't seen it for the better part of 20 years, and in NXT's booking in 2017-2019 was so fresh and vital.  But the novelty wore off by the third year of it and now that another company does it better and stays much truer to the original concept, WWE's version just feels stilted and sanitized.  I'd be so much more excited to see Cody's Squad vs. Judgment Day as a five-on-five Survivor Series match, which I know is a lot to ask....AT SURVIVOR SERIES.

This show, like last year's, has a men's WarGames and a women's WarGames, both of which will feel interminably long and feature the same tables, chairs, kendo sticks and watered down WWE violence that, when you think about the bodily risk, is just as barbaric if not moreso than what WWE considers too barbaric (getting bludgeoned repeatedly with a kendo stick seems way more brutal to me than a controlled blade job).  The other inherent problem with two WarGames matches on one show is that the rules are structured so the heels basically *have* to get the man advantage every time or the match just doesn't work.  And that is my main gripe about WarGames in general; when Dusty came up with the concept it didn't occur to him (or maybe it did and he just didn't care) that the match has to play out with the same formula every single time.  Whenever WWE tries to circumvent the heel-man advantage the match is just a heatless clusterfuck.  So you either end up with two matches that play out the exact same way or a situation with a bad WarGames match.  Survivor Series matches are simply better; they can play out in a variety of different scenarios and the two teams don't have to have a blood feud for it to mean something.

All this to say, I'm not particularly excited about WarGames.  But let's look at the lineup.

Carlito vs. Santos Escobar

I cannot believe that in 2023 someone in WWE thought reviving a failed WCW stable from 25 years ago was a good idea - why is the LWO a thing again?  And now because Santos's main rival Rey Mysterio is on the shelf he's fighting a dude who hasn't been relevant since 2007?  Huh?  Couldn't Dragon Lee or Ricochet or Nakamura have gotten a match here instead?  Santos is waiting to fight his real enemy so I think he beats Carlito.

Pick: Santos

Women's World Championship: Rhea Ripley vs. Zoey Starks

Man, they didn't even try with the two title matches on this show.  You have two dominant heel champs facing weak babyfaces who don't stand a fuckin' chance.  This will be a short throwaway and Rhea will win.

Pick: Rhea retains

AEW Full Gear 2023 Preview & Predictions

This Saturday it's the fifth(!) annual AEW Full Gear, emanating from Kia Forum in sunny Los Angeles!

For whatever reason Full Gear tends to be a consistently strong PPV every year, and I see no reason to think this will be any exception.  As of now we have eight main show matches and a pre-show match with title and storyline ramifications.  Looks like AEW will reach the 11,000-ticket mark, making this their best-selling show since All In.  The company seems to be finding the right formula of price point, local promotion, and general fan interest to bring in a consistently healthy crowd to their shows, and that's very encouraging.  They just need that one red-hot angle to get everyone talking again.

This lineup looks very strong on paper, as basically all their PPVs do, and numerous matches have a real story to them (in spite of what the beyond-the-pale anti-AEW crowd would have you believe), plus there's the ongoing intrigue of who's behind the Devil mask (I have my theory but we'll get to that).  Should be a helluva fun slate of matches and we also have the just-announced Continental Classic (think G1 Climax but with AEW wrestlers) to look forward to over the next month!

Let's look at the card....

Zero Hour ROH Tag Team Championship: MJF/??? vs. The Gunns

Once again young Max is pulling double duty, as he and a TBD partner will defend the ROH Tag belts agains Austin and Colten.  This will likely be another short match, and the outcome really kinda depends on who the partner is.  All signs point to Samoa Joe, who's offered to help out only if Max gives him another title shot.  That could really go either way, as I could see Joe dominating the match and giving the champs a win, but I could also see Joe screwing Max over.  Personally I think if Adam Cole isn't coming back anytime soon it's probably time to move on from this experiment, as MJF has enough on his plate without a set of secondary tag belts.

Pick: The Gunns

Top Ten Things: David Fincher Films RANKED

Welcome to another edition of Top Ten Things, here at Enuffa.com, where I rattle off ten somethingorothers in some kind of order and explain why I chose said order.

Today I'll be ranking the films of vaunted director David Fincher.  I've been following Mr. Fincher's career since the beginning, when he cut his feature film teeth with the third Alien film.  I was immediately struck by his distinctive visual style; even as a first-time director his films had a unique, noirish look that was bleak, harsh, and compositionally spectacular.  Fincher became one of Hollywood's hottest auteurs only a few years later, and now boasts one of the most intriguing filmographies in the business.  No matter what his films are about I'll always go out of my way to see them; two of the entries on this list remain among my all-time favorite movies.

So let's get started.  Here's how I rank the films of David Fincher....

12. Alien 3

Anyone who knows me is aware I hate this film.  Hate it.  With the raging intensity of a thousand soccer riots.  No sequel has ever pissed me off as much as this one (as documented HERE).  But goddamn if this isn't a beautiful-looking film.  20th Century Fox clearly hired the visually gifted music video veteran Fincher to make the film they wanted to make, hoping he'd just "yes" them to death and they'd have another hit on their hands (Given that the wildly successful Alien and Aliens were both directed by strong-willed visionaries I'm not sure why the studio didn't want the same kinda thing this time).  But Fincher had his own ideas for the film, and it was a combative shoot from the get-go (It didn't help that the studio rushed the movie into production without a finished script), one that Fincher described as a miserable experience.  He has since disowned the movie, declining to take part in a Director's Cut for the Blu Ray release.  Regardless of its unimaginative storyline though, Alien 3 is a visually incredible horror film that demonstrated emphatically Fincher's singular gift for creating cinematically stunning, atmospheric films.

11. The Curious Case of Benjamin Button

Probably the most disappointing Fincher film besides Alien 3 was this strange, Forrest Gump-esque parable about a man who ages in reverse.  Brad Pitt plays the title character, born as a tiny, frail old man, who grows younger with age.  Button befriends a young girl and the two become soul mates of sorts, until eventually she becomes a matronly figure for him as a little boy.  The film is impressive technically, and boasts fine performances, but aside from the gimmickry of the story there isn't a lot to sink one's teeth into.  I never felt very emotionally engaged, and ultimately the movie felt like an exploration of the gimmick, rather than a story that really needed to be told.  Still, Fincher lent Benjamin Button his usual visual flair, making this worth a look.

10. Panic Room

Fincher's most genre-specific movie was the Hitchcockian Panic Room, about a woman and her daughter being sieged in their own home by a gang of thieves.  This first-rate thriller is a classic cat-and-mouse game, but sets itself apart from lesser films by staying a step ahead of the audience's expectations and occasionally reversing the roles.  Jodie Foster and Forest Whitaker give strong, believable performances as the mother and the head thief, respectively, while Jared Leto and Dwight Yoakam have memorable supporting turns.  Also of note, this was one of Kristen Stewart's first roles, as Foster's precocious eleven-year-old daughter.  Panic Room doesn't have the lasting appeal of Fincher's better works, but it's most certainly a well-made example of suspense filmmaking that manages never to insult the audience's intelligence.  It's a smartly-written film for the initiated viewer.

NJPW Power Struggle 2023 Preview & Predictions

NJPW Power Struggle is back after two years, and it just so happens to be this weekend!

What used to be sort of the final PPV stop on the road to the Tokyo Dome is returning on Saturday and there are a couple surefire bangers on tap, plus a major AEW guest talent.  Coming out of this show we should have a sense of what's in store for WrestleKingdom 18 aside from the lackluster-on-paper main event.  Let's take a look...

David Finlay vs. Tanga Loa

Kind of a get-back match for Finlay after dropping the NEVER Openweight Title to Tanga's brother Tama Tonga (who's already lost the title himself to Shingo).  I don't expect a classic here but maybe they'll pull off something solid.

Pick: Finlay

SANADA & Yuya Uemura vs. Tetsuya Naito & Yota Tsuji

This is a preview of the WK18 main event (which has to be the weakest since 2012), but with a couple of the young fellas thrown in.  Seriously, I don't know why they went back to the Naito well for this title match.  With an underwhelming champion like Sanada in there I get putting him against an established name, but NJPW desperately needs some new blood at the top of the card and Yota Tsuji would've been an exciting challenger to kick off a new era (look how rabid the Dominion crowd was for him to beat Sanada).  Are they doing this to set up Naito vs. Tsuji for the February show?

Pick: I'll go with the LIJ fellas to win